night time, night skies, my sighs...

2008-07-24T00:25:00.005+08:00

All in the name of charity...

..i shaved my head!

...wish the staff and volunteers of the Children Cancer Foundation well in their fund raising programmes, ( but not to well to get corrupted and ruined:)

P.S. : ...and stop saying i just enlisted.

2008-06-26T01:24:00.002+08:00

MORON.

See the happy moron,

He doesnt give a damn.

I wish i were a moron--

My God, perhaps I am!

---Anonymous rhyme

2008-06-21T16:19:00.002+08:00

*gasp* finally! starhub!

after 4 years holding on to my m1 plan, i am proud to say i had successfully hopped over to starhub!

i first signed up for m1 because i didnt had a choice as i was 16 yrs old at that time. m1 was the only mobile service provider that allow me to sign. (others only allow 18yrs olds) starhub at that time, was still 'green'(no pun intended) and has poor economics.

i could only have a handphone only at that time as my parents insist that they didnt want to have an extra liability add-on to their main liability, which is me. ( ha! wait till someone gets old and become a liability! u will see!)

back to the topic!

at that time, i really wanted a hp! all my friends had one! hell! the craze abt the ultra classic nokia 3310 had already passed! i bet everyone remembers that craze; pasar malam at that time would have all sort of bling bling and add-ons to 'zeng' your phone. classmates would come to school with their new transparent covers and show off! LOL! haha!

but parents were right about phone being a liability. i had to pay a average of 50/mth for my phone bill. it didnt help that unlike my friends, i had to pay for my own phone bill out of my pocket money, which was like, what, 3 a day? hence, i had to slowly cut down on my usage, but the bill rarely drop below 40 although my plan was 20+ only.

slowly, i start to evaluate my bill and start to take note of stupid extra costs and effects of per minute billing. all these extra cost seem little on their own but at up to a huge 'unnecessary' on my bills! even during the second term of my contract and the loyalty discounts, my bills did not decrease. but being locked-on in the contract, i realize that there's little i could do, and makes me increasingly frustrated. furthermore, the nature of my area, receive bad reception coverage and i often had 'call breakages'! wtf! i had enough! 4 yrs is a long enough time to proof yrself, m1!

With full mumber port, i risk nothing!

NOW, STARHUB is the new green! i was offered a deal i could not resist.

this is my basic plan:

-100mins outgoing
-all time incoming
-12mths free caller id
-500 sms

for abt 25+

but but but....

because im a NSF i got a super duper offer!

-200mins outgoing(100min free for student plan)
-all time incoming
-12mths free caller id
-unlimited free sms(wtf!)
- 20% coporate distcount

but but but but.....

thats not all!

i signed up during the IT show and they gave me...

-half yr free subscription! (wtf!)
- free $50 robinson voucher

and and and...

my 'friend' wanted to get a new phone and paid me 300 for the phone dist and the voucher!

which effectively is the remaining cost of the whole bill!

woohoo! free plan!

M1! can u beat that?

2008-05-30T17:51:00.003+08:00

STRUGGLE........................................................................................................................................

'Time' gets worse by the day. The only console is that 'time' will past and it will all end 'one day'. But 'one day' seem as elusive as 'happily ever after' and 'once upon a time' from fairy tales.

Someone said that 'time' will pass, (before u know it), if u enjoy the moment. Treat it like a movie, enjoy it, laugh and cry with it, and soon, the curtain will fall. However, 'time', to me is like watch the 'test' screen on off-air channels, as a movie; the only way u know that there's no 'hanging' is through the timer on the VCD player. Laughter and applause are artificially induced using place cards tied on 'stick'.

Haiz. Enough of the sob story.

By the way, im going to run a marathon this week, been training for it, been yearning for it. Need to do something to make me feel alive. Need to find a meaningful bookmark for this part of my life. Hope everything will go well.

2007-09-16T15:18:00.000+08:00

i shed a tear...

..a happy tear!

i had just returned from my chalet with my 4e2 '4Ever 2gether' classmates, and still couldnt dampen the 'heart-trobbing' euphoria that i always felt with them...

class outings like this are always what im marking out for, every year and i make a whole lotta effort to make these days free..

the stupid pranks we play on each other, the mahjong games i ALWAYS win, the soccer cheers...

ROXS!

the strange smell of nostalgic started even during the traveling to pasir ris..; i saw one of my former BMT sgt on the train,( we didnt say hi though, maybe thats the stupid MAN'S PRIDE think that guys think they have) watever

reaching pasir ris, i couldnt help notice that the price of 'ben's & jerry's ' ice cream have doubled!

-this is because the standard of ' ben's & jerry's girls have drastically gone down!

-once upon a time, in april 2007, u could buy and eat 'vanilla ice cream' with more than one of yr '5 main senses',

the girls would be usually be some kawaii jap-looking girl in micro minis with teary eyes....

those were the days.. where we eat 'eyes creams'..

this day, i rather walk over to old chang kee and get my 1.30 sotong head on stik served by the malay auntie!

reaching there, i found a shop i found a shop that sells one on those tiny styroform airplanes that sells for 50 cents in the mama shops...

trying to reminse my long lost innocence, i immediate jump at the chance to buy, with my heart chanting with the childish chant of ' I wan! I wan!'

but i immediately turn into a parent, 'NO SON!', when i heard the price. it was a ~!@#$%^& 1.20 for a puny styroform!

'bloody hell! i could build u a styroform tomb for 1.20!'

but Bloody fifi! , i still bought the tomb

it was a north american mustang which is suppose to look like this:

but what i got is a:

blah.

mich's celebration is crazy!...i tink its better to spread through word of mouth..

this year is a bit different from last yr, everyone seems to be bringing a special someone to the chalet, a 'sweet young thing', a 'dude'..

does it symbolize that we slowly have our individual life and will eventually like parallel lines; never cross?

hope not.

(darn! im starting to miss them now.)

..and i shed a tear.

2007-06-17T17:45:00.000+08:00

take 5

qn: can u still find me? with my botak head? hee.

~~~

in the army, i did an experiment and found out that a rifle could not stand on its own!

hence, likewise, people could not stand on their own...

we all need friends...XD

in the army, people tend to face many 'breaking points' where u feel like giving up, or giving 'the
bastard' a tight slap...

often the power of friends, help to solve problems...

friends encourage each other to carry on..

friends give u the strength to move on...

friends help u to write letter to 'shoot' officers....

I.A. I.A. I.A.

'friends'(O.O.) help u to 'shoot' officers...

encouragements somehow allows people to work better...

~~

in my next NS assignment, i want to encourage and motivate~
(within reason.)

~~

on a side note..

friends in the NS are important too because...

they are very intelligent people...

they are future lawyers..

scientists...

doctors...

pilots....

me? erm.. erm.. erm...

-if one day i become a insurance agent, i know who to turn to!

~~

' I dont need u to be the best, i only want the best from u.'- T.T. Chua(2LT)
-something that i would remb, for a long long time...(i hope.)

'bloody hell!'-Damien Wah(3sgt)
-most popular curse in the army.

'how was (insert random activity) ?'-(officer)
-most redundant question.

'outstanding!'-(recruits)
-most redundant reply.

'sure or not?-Aragon(3sgt)
-most redundant reply, to a reply.

~~~

~* thanks for everything, and everything else, guys...i had a great time!!...*~

(apart from the back aches, knee sprains, cough, and sore eyes...)

~~

dont really know where i would be posted too... i would be happy either way...
just hoping that i would be blessed and my back would not be injured further...

~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2007-04-12T14:56:00.000+08:00

MINUTES to midnight :(

well.. hee.

i getting a new job!

after tml..i would be working for the singapore army!

thanks to the pay hike!

while ministers are getting pay rise from from $1.2 mil to 2.1 mil,

i would be getting an increment from $350 to 450, which makes up to the whopping sum of $0.50/hr!

btw, the company thinks so highly of me, and is sending mi to an 'overseas' training stint!

hence, i would be allow to participate in a world class, off-shore training centre, survivor style!

my 'company' really cares about my welfare.

foodwise...it feeds me 'space age' field packs, and exotic delicacies, such as flame-roasted wild boar!

they are concern about my fitness too!

i get all the workouts, tan i need, and the kind instructors there MAKE SURE OF IT.

on top of that, i would be able to exchange my ic for an all exclusive green one!

GREEN! MY FAVOURITE COLOR!

and of course, the stylo-milo stanley wang hair cut!

all this for FREE! FREE! FREE!

(everything's,everyone's free except me)

wow!

im so so so freaking excited..cant wait to pack mi bags.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

2007-03-08T23:33:00.002+08:00

A's :S

okie, to people who havent know, i screwed up my A's. (Am still rather insecure to tell the world wat idiot im, so i wont reveal my grades.)

haiz.

sometimes trying yr best is not good enough..people around me would realli literally SEE wat i meant.

-getting yourself sick eating mac everyday,
-watching yr bank balance decrease by $10 and getting yourself sick eating mac everyday,
-going home late and getting scolded for 'assumed' fooling around, while seeing yr bank balance decrease by $10 and getting yourself sick eating mac everyday...
....IS REALLY FREAKING SICK!!

...and NO, the proud boy doesnt like to be consoled.
he thinks its a case of sour grapes.
- 'becoz u didnt get what u want, u look into the mirror, smile to yrself, pat yr own back and say 'hey! not bad!' --> this is hell not yu jun.( not bad = not good too!)
hence, he keeps his frustrations under his blanket, inside himself..and 'gift' himself sleepless nights chasing for lost causes.

...and NO, the proud boy thinks that he shant apply for Universities cause he's so sure that he wont make it.
even if he does, he wont be happy..because he feel that if someone with 'his' grades go into Uni, he's a freaking loser.

...and NO, the proud boy thinks he's too big for private Us. He thinks that private Us does not give him the university 'life' that he wants.
( he's demanding even though he suck.)

somehow, fairy Ms 'william BlAkEY' appeared out of the gloomy dark sky.

she says.

'YJ, stop having these extreme moods, where u think that everything is only good or bad, with no in-betweens.'

'life, is about the process, and not only the end...sometimes we dont get what we want..but we do learn when we fall.'

'you must learn to believe in yourself, have more self confidence, and understand that you are unique too, and good in your own right.'

'you must learn to draw a line, step over it and move right on! if u look back, u might trip and fall!... and that's aint good.'

'there's always options in life - 'life's not a dead end' - only that sometimes these might not be the chances u want, but - 'trust me' - they will turn out good too.'

...with that, the fairy, 'gift' the jaded boy a Kaleidoscope and said:

' look at the world in different angles, and admire the colour's in't '

...and hence, the jaded boy 'postpones' his plans to cause a train 'delay'...and savw the happy bangalas from washing blood-stained MRT tracks.

..and live to tell this tale..to his other jaded friends.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to Jamie: take care when u go batam okie! hope the amulet would keep u safe!- realli realli realli!

to round: heard u're going to genting...have fun and take care okie!

to B2: we still roxs!

to mahjong gang: oi! i wan mj leh!

to neighbours: we would win the BB comp at jurong entertainment! ahha!

to xiang ru: happy birthday to u!

to Felicia: get well soon! ..fast okie! wanna play BB with u! ahah! *very thirsty* lol!

to Janice: have heard from u for a while...

to 05a21: lucks in everything u do! love u guys and gals!

to ada: ......*smile* ??

2007-03-01T19:46:00.000+08:00

Bugis (bagus?)

yesterday, went out with xiang, his parents and, yi yang to go 'si ma lu'-(chinese temple) to go bai bai.(pray) This is because they 'fan tai sui' which means that their 'horoscope offend the gods this year, and have to go pray pray to prevent bad things from happening on them'. And...i tagged along!

i went into 'kwan ying' temple to ask for two divination lots.

the first one as shown, is to ask whether i would do well for my 'A's!
the guy told me: 'u would not do very well'.(sob.) but the thing is that i would be able to continue studying. And my 'studying career' does not end here. Maybe the key to' happiness is to be contented.'

the second one, hee....is to ask when that special 'rainie yang' would appear!( haha! for the fun of it!) the guy told me that its 'someone' near to me. And 'someone' that's in my school or studies with me..so if i hav a liking to 'someone', i should 'go for it!' WTF! liddat also can!- he added that i have luck and try my hand on betting. hehe. $$$$

- btw, results and toto are both on the same day!
if i screw up for exams yet strike toto ( 1 bil!)...that's aint bad at all! haha!

.....with that....i part with 12 dollars.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
haiz....tml's result day...will i screw up big time?
only time will tell! time will tell....

hui yan: well...xiao meiii meii, will love to see u soon too! dun be too stressed, okie!
jamie: heard u are sick because of indian food! hope u will get well soon..la.
janice: just chill okie! everything will jst fall into place! nice hair!
4e2: spending time with u guys is always great!
guozhan: ass! win me in billard...make me lose $13.20. u wait. u wait. i tio toto dun give u money!

p.s. dunno why cannot seem to scan my pics. will do it tml!

2007-02-17T22:25:00.000+08:00

happi cny!

this entry is to wish everyone a happi chinese new year...like this song, hope that everyone would have one million! haha! a very nice hokkien song.

i got the mp3, can ask me to send u, if im online!

so for substitute..here's the youtube version!

一百萬

詞/曲：黃一飛

若是我有一百萬一百萬我有一百萬一世人就輕鬆

無講無人知講到真歹勢吃甲彼呢大漢擱不曾坐飛機

打拼彼多年無車無厝擱無愛人看人娶某擱做生意

有錢擱有勢若是我有一百萬我要坐飛機

我要遊世界HAWAII曬太陽日本吃壽司

若是我有一百萬我要買車買厝山珍甲海味

啥人卡福氣來乎我做某若是我有一百萬一百萬

若是你有欠用錢開嘴免客氣若是我有一百萬

我要坐飛機我要遊世界義大利飲咖啡路邊吃Spaghetti

若是我有一百萬我要買車買厝買店來收租閒閒免做工

帶狗去散步若是我有一百萬一百萬若是你有欠用錢開嘴免客氣

若是我有一百萬一百萬十千八千拿去用免還嘛無問題

若是我有一百萬一百萬

口白：朋友啊,你想一百萬真多啊!

this is the direct translation from vendy.multiply.com

If I have got one million, one million,
I got one million, my whole life no worries,
Never say nobody knows, say already very shy,
Eat until so big, never sat on a plane before,

Worked so hard for so many years, no car no house and also no lover,
See people get married and do business, got money and got success,

If I have got one million, I wanna sit on a plane,
I wanna explore the world, Hawaii to sun bath,
Japan eat sushi ( treat you eat sushi )

If I have got one million, I wanna buy car buy house,
eat all the delicacies of the world, who got the good luck,
be my girl

If I have got one million, one million,
If you need to borrow money, just open your mouth and ask and no need shy shy,

Never say nobody knows, say already very shy,
Eat until so big, never sat on a plane before,

Worked so hard for so many years, no car no house and also no lover,
See people get married and do business, got money and got success,

If I have got one million, I wanna sit on a plane,
I wanna explore the world, Italy drink coffee,
Road side eat spaghetti ( road side eat spaghetti )

If I have got one million, I wanna buy car buy house,
Buy shop to collect rent, easy easy no need to work,
Bring dog go for a walk,

If I have got one million, one million,
If you need to borrow money, just open your mouth and ask and no need shy shy,

If I have got one million, one million,
Ten thousand eight thousand take go and use,
No need to pay back also no problem ( pay back money not a problem )

If I have got one million, one million,
Wei friend, you think one million a lot ah?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

for people who hates their relatives, just remb.....u only see them once a year...

just smile and be nice...and they will remb u for being the cute cute guy/gal!

..although wat u only wan is their hong bao!

haha!

2007-02-06T18:12:00.000+08:00

Adam's apple

the poisonous apple that snow white ate,
made pretty snow white really really sick.

the venomous poison Adam's apple said,
made a dame's summer really really sick.

~~~

'A' aint for apple and 'B' is for bye.
Things changes so fast, i didnt know why.

silence, the deaf's music, the mute's voice,
unanswered questions, to be your choice.

'A' aint for apple and 'B' is for bye.
Things happens so fast, i didnt yet cry.

'friends come and go'... as most would say.
two new friends for one...is that a bargain?

'A' aint for apple and 'B' is for bye.
Things happens so fast, i couldnt even try.

but to a silly, drunk, Ancient Dragon's Aoe,(woe)
some things 'though broken, are never sold.'(sow)

'A' aint for apple and 'B' is for bye.
things changes so fast, i didnt say bye.

~~

once u said i made u laugh.
only now i know, the joke's on me.

~~

goodbye and keep cold. :X
haiz... i never get to call u my adaish girl...but we had fun...rite? at least i had fun!
good luck to u.. and everything u are doing and will do.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

haiz..life super slow for now. tink im growing dumb.

2007-01-17T20:16:00.000+08:00

Hollow man

'don't judge a book by its cover!' that's what my father says.

while helping out at my father's shop, he taught me about puff making.

'curry puffs should not be filled with to much filling. this is because it would break, and not look nice, and no one would want to buy.'
(although, it's supposely, the better quality ones)

people, are superficial idiots that care about looks.

quoting from Oscar Wilde's Dorian Gray( thanks Ada!)
the ones who say that they are not, are the most superficial, because they know the effect of it.

some friends have been going clubbing to meet new cute people.

but dont they realize that cute people are like cotton candy....

...nice to see, sweet to eat, everything 'seems' good.

but cotton candy are cotton candy, no matter how much to eat, it could never fill your stomach.

you could never find contentment and happiness in them.

but all girls, being girls, are kids...and sadly...love cotton candy.

me?

i would like to call myself maybe, a simple kaya bun.

maybe a little 'plain and simple' on the outside...

but 'sweet and warm' on the inside.

oh well.

one day, i will find a girl that would like to eat a warm kaya bun.

while, she eats the bun...hehe...im eating her up too!( kidding!)

sure hope she's a 'cotton candy' girl!

~~

with friends getting married at 21.... it become wierd that people are wondering that why the hell i still dont have a girlfriend.

people have told me i look tall, gay, cute(hee.), flirt, nice, and all sorts of stuff...and look extremely shock that i dun have a gf..yet..(shy)

some of my friends tried introducing girls to me, telling me, so and so is very 'fuck-able' and stuff..

but, that so 'uncool!'

i hate people who does that and degrades girls like that.

but if its Misa Amane (from death note2), den i will give chance.( haha!)

if i wanna screw someone, it would be someone that i really like...

or else i would rather surf the beautiful pictorial world of the 'WORLD WIDE WEB.'

its isn't like im a super despo nerd geek, who doesn't have a life.

i, for one, have two 'good friends'.

namely, my left hand, and my right hand.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

haven complete this post! no time no time! will write the comments soon. hee. sorry for not updating this for a super duper long time....hee.

2006-11-26T17:17:00.000+08:00

FAIRY TALE

it all started wif a smile...
(or maybe a few smiles...)
i smiled at her, she smiled at me...we made friends...( as i asked for her number. *heh.*)

-later we agree to call it FATE.

~~

i met this girl in the 'underwater world themed' macdonalds, when i was studying shakes...

a rather cute girl, angelic, with the pony tail and the big eyes...
(a 'mabel chew' lookalike, like Xiang said)

its all very apt, cause she loves fairy tales and the fantasy that it holds, jst like the joy and laughter that she brings when we are studying together...

she's a simple girl.

so simple that her name only contains 3 letters and 2 alphebets...and even it the world flipped..and u read her name from behind, it will still sound the same, and her laughter will not change...

one thing changed!

studying's fun and cool now! with her!

we had lots of fun.

i had lots of fun.

she loves to laugh.

she makes me laugh.

sometimes i think..

she comes suddenly, as if out of nowhere, as if God knows im stressed, and gives me a 'candy', in the form of her.

but 'God's' unfair.

he gives a boy a lollipop and snatchs it back after barely his first few licks!

her exams end on the 21st, and she leave after that, just like cinderella leaves the ball after 12...

would she leave a trace, her glass slippers behind, so that a 'prince' could look for her?

maybe there no 'prince' and she's the best princess in the world..

but hey, even the 'beast' gets 'belle'!!!

do i deserve to be left with a frown?

'how unfair!'

"hey God! cant u just give the child a bit more? Christmas's around the corner!
..and i had been a good boy the whole damn year!
i did my homework! i brushed my teeth before i sleep!"

~~

maybe it foreshadows when we played 'old maid' together.

one side's always the 'old maid' while the other's the winner,

they can never be together, despite the laughter,

looks like 'happily ever after' is without her.

~~

the last day we studied together, that very last day,

she wears a t-shirt that's printed 'louder', as if its prompting me to say the words, that few words, i want to say, from my heart.

yet before i could make a sound, she covers herself, ( and the words..), with her windbreaker, backwards, as she always does, and plugs on her zen, that plays 'sentimental' love songs.

her 'bye bye ring ring' tone plays...

"if i lay here,

if i just lay here,

would u lie with me,

and just forget the world?"

..and everytime i call, i scream the response at the top of my voice,

but she cant hear them, she havent answered the call,

yet when she answers, the song ends...

and i wake up from my dream.

i wet my bed again.

kidding.

hah.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

for people who are wondering....the above is written as an allusion of JC life, and the fun we had.

for people who are thinking hard enough...u are probably on the right track.

for people who need a straight answer... well, erm i dont like prawns. only jap.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To 'round': we probably dont chat as much now, but thanks for being 'around'!

And i wanna wish u happiness, in everthing u do!

To hama: good luck for yr SATS!

To ada: u probably wont see this entry, cause u wont know my blog!

well...i will still be bugging u! good luck in yr working place!

to 2e4/4e2 gang: i had lots of fun! thanks!

to S.W.L: i dun like u! u gay bastard! win my money!

2006-10-27T10:13:00.000+08:00

Flesyme

wrote this thingy on the bus tt day.

sorry people todae's post quite boring and short. no time to write nicely.

you are beautiful as it seems
like the love that lies in between
your heart and the angelic actions that you do
make kindness seem like a simple thing.
u're tall, as of the hieights of skies.
yet i know, your warmth is just beside....

but innocence and purity would not last.
the world's ugly, dark and unjust.
Flesyme, now that i have you by my side,
what is left is a flipside,
a 'flipslide' of me.

dunno what it means? flip the title!

haiz.

i must be darn depressed at that time.

all will change!

~~

left my past behind! looking at the future!
enjoying my mugging days more and more.

(aint gonna tell u why!)

snicker.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to sheena: happy birthday! sorry that i couldnt stay and celebrate your birthday with the 'guys'.
been quite busy! can drop by mac anytime...i can treat u la. ahahah!

to Ada: nice knowing u! although the way we met is darn wierd/funny! haha!
u make a realli good study-mate, and i enjoyed having a great laugh everytime we study together! thanks to your mum!

2006-10-20T01:19:00.000+08:00

AMBITION.

from young, i didnt really have a ambition about what i want to be. it seems like no job would interest me... i want a realli free life, to live life on ambition and passion rather than being stuck in a 'rat race' or earn big bucks.

i jst found my perfect job, surfing the net that day(kidding!)

it is to be a porn star.

it is the only job i think that u can earn big bucks and 'have fun!'

i tink i can pass the entrance test too...

i got one 'hell of a rock' but im not gonna tell u where!

on a serious note...i realli got a thing about jap girls la.

i tink they are realli cute..

round says: ' that i like kawaii girls with long pony-tailed hair and beautiful eyes'

she's right.( she looks jst like that though.... but we are jst friends)

round says:' that ALL guys have wet dreams EVERYDAY.'

erm..i told her 'i dont know..cause i dont check my briefs when i wake up.'

i jst change the bedsheets. (lol! kidd.)

~~

see...

Mihiro Taniguchi

kids...i can see a budge on your pants!(better hide it from yr mama!)

wah lao eh. xiu xiu! so big liao still wet pants! (hee.)

~~

i want a jap girlfriend next time.

i dont tell grandpa though.

he used to say that 'it serves the japs right.'

the rape of nanking..the chinese get raped and killed....

NOW..we watch their PORN.(LOL!)

grandpa's watching WWE now.

he still gets a 'hard-on' when tajiri gets slammed.

come to think of it...why the jap girls are so hot, but jap guys look like lechers/retards?

<----- times havent changed much! ------->

looks like competition's quite weak!

hmm...that means i'd have a great future there!

i tink grandpa would give me a pat on my head.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

the reason why im blogging today about ambition( although im really darn busy), is because i realize that lots of friends have questions that they cannot solve.
some about enlistment and 'signing on' in NS, some about love, some about life after JC...
this part of this entry is for all friends that have problems.

my answer to all these problems is :
why make everything seem so complicated.

actually the answers are all there.

its just whether u accept it or not.

do u all still remember this song we used to sing when we're young?

Que Sera, Sera,

Whatever will be, will be

The future's not ours, to see

Que Sera, Sera

What will be, will be.

-dont be troubled by things u cant change. leave it all to fate? this is answer to all of u.

to 'round' : we dont seem to chat that much anymore do we, is it me? or u? anyway, remember to go get yr jab, before the exams!

to jeffree: i know u are reading this. where's my calculator? get me one soon!

to that 'half of B square': thanks for yr super long testi! say hi to yr kid brother for mi!

to shari: work hard okie! we would squeeze a way through to Uni! thanks for yr grape gummi sweet!

to mr chu: thanks for yr pen!

to ching hong and 'others that are still wondering': that girl is not my girlfriend! we are kinda of close and she kinda, cute but we dont have feelings for each other! so stop speculating!

to xiang and sujin: this entry is for u, guys! hope what i wrote made sense to u. be happy! okay? got problem, still can come to this, brother!

2006-10-14T14:03:00.000+08:00

B square.

thats the name we gave ourself. well...i wrote a song...my singing suxs(hee!),
but its the thoughts that counts rite?

thanks for being around.

even if its just a while.

http://www.uploadfile.fr/show.php/1460_Iwillmissmissingu..mp3.html

~~
I will miss missing you

now that you dont paint my rainbows
anymore
i am losing my colours
now that you dont light up my life
anymore
i cant see my way

And..
i will miss missing you
for all the times we spend together
i will miss missing you
for all the joy and the laughter

And..
i will miss missing you
for all the times we spend together
i will miss missing you
that brings the tears rolling after

And..i will be missing you.
And.. i will miss missing you.

~~

thanks for everything. and everything else.
word's cant discribe how i feel about u. "B's"
i wish i could write more.
i wish im still holding on.

good bye or 'zai jian'?
does it matter?

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
i wished i could have played better
i wished i could have sang better..

2006-10-07T19:12:00.001+08:00

ENDING.

next week's my last week of school. everything's happening so fast...friends that i seem to have just met are going to part with me soon...

recently, between my study breaks, i start to think about the ups and downs of my JC life..things that i will remember forever..suddenly..i remembered this ordinary friend that had probably created history through the things he did....

his name is KENNETH.

he caused the 'house' to minus points because he didnt throw his cigarettes properly...

and thats the least 'naughty' thing he did.

he's daring in his actions, and somewat 'cool!'..if u know wat i mean.

he had sex with a girl (apparently not very cute one la!) in the school toilet.

after that, the girl begged him not to tell anyone about it.

guess what?

Kenneth told his soccer teammate about it...and told them it's a secret..DON'T SPREAD.

his mates told their mates about and ask them to keep it a secret too....

and slowly..haha...the whole school noe liao. ( please keep this a secret too!)

'cool!'

~~~

he started a friendster account that he uses to redicule the principal and the teachers in the school.

it has all sort of shit, nicknames for teachers and its just darn funny.

he even created a 'cheer rap' for the principal which i heard once only...

"miss yeo, miss yeo, si bei chio!
miss yeo, miss yeo, si bei chio!...."

the rest i couldnt remember...

the conclusion is...

well, he was caught and suspended for a while...

"cool!"

~~~

he once wrote in his econ essay script about some funny shit, about a VCD pirate.

"in the short run, being a VCD pirate, u can earn big bucks....
BUT..in the long run, u will get caught and end up in jail!"

he had BALLS.

"cool!"

~~~

he dropped out after the first year and went to poly...

our school dont miss him though.

he's probably screwing some girl at a HDB staircase now.

he's probably having great fun now.

i wished i was in his position.

erm..i meant i want to have fun now.

hee.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

to all JC friends: well, no matter if we are close or not, u like me or not, i like u or not, i still want to say 'thanks.' u probably made me a better person this way or another.

to 'people who dont like mi': u dont have to feel guilty, i probably bitched about u anyway.

' i know that one day far away,
we would cease to meet and play.
i'd close my eyes, smile,
and say 'thanks',
for being there by me..those days.'

to jameee: in yr blog, if u swap all the '西' to 'sai', your entry would sound darn funny lol!

Disclaimer: all people described in this entry are fake and fiction. if any similarities are seen, it is because u are too sensitive and a pure coincidence. i don't wanna get my ass fried.

2006-10-04T00:35:00.000+08:00

LESSON LEARNED.

..never speak bad about yr teachers behind their backs.

sometimes, during my free time, i would go and chat with the book shop aunties, and they would bitch abt the econs ' boss' teacher to me and stuff. we would be bitching, about the height, and his likes and so on...lah.

i tink that he's a realli nice teacher though, he works darn hard.

he's funny and weird as he tries to make his analogy and insults, subtle, yet crude.
but to a arts kid, i jst could barely conceal my laughter, at his blatant 'clown acts'...sometimes he's a irony himself....with his 'im tall' stripped shirts.

shhh, i think...he heard mi.

damn.

he took revenge today.

this morn..in lecture he suddenly speeched that i made a 114% improvement in my econs grades.

..and hence, the most improved student!

that's darn embarrassing. WTF!

who in the blue hell improves by 114%!

tt means tt i screwed up big time the last time round!

he's virtually announcing to the whole ARTS that im a retard.

the thing was, my grade wasnt all tt great.

it was jst a E grade...i barely scraped.

maybe he's congratulating me that i am promoted from a retard to a E- 'idiot'

what a joke.

he's stretching it.

he's buying mi a gift for being a 'idiot'.

i feel like crying.

(i can hear him smirking.)

"sorry 'Cher', i will not bitch abt u anymore. dun give me present, can?"

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
to all 'friends': im mugging like nuts now. everything's ending in 42 days. it sucks and roxs at the same time. haiz. mugging make me miss all of u. happy mooncake festival(a festive of reunion)...ii will be eating Mac though.

~~miss u guys and gals!(yes! im talking abt u!) lots...lots.

2006-10-04T00:26:00.000+08:00

LAUGHS. ( today's entry is darn funny)

guess what peeps!

*drum roll*

i passed all my 'A' lvl exams papers!

haha!

2006-09-30T18:26:00.000+08:00

DRUGGED.

been living on a diet of Mac, Panadol, and Red bull.

that sucks...big time!

i feel like a drugged cow kicking his own balls because it is red.

..and i dont have milk.(lol!)

i know that my flesh would probably not rot when i die because of the 'shit' i have in my body now.

but i cant help it.

i want it darn badly.

~~

i know that certain things...no matter how much u try, u might not get..

exams dont seem to be one. ( i hope!)

thats why im virtually working my 'balls' off to do well.

i hope the cambridge people are blind, and they aren't vain.

that's because my handwriting still sucks, (although i read them fine!)

i hope he's blind to my errors too.

maybe that will make him happier - and me too:)

~~

recently, friends around me had not been happy.

because, their life is shitty now.

(but, FUCK! whose life isnt shitty)

life's shitty...that's why we shit every other day! (if u dont, u are full of shit.)

darn. i haven been shitting though.

looks like red bull doesnt contain lots of fibre.

maybe i should eat paper.

rather, i think i should make it into a 'round' and throw it on my 'lost' friends.

WAKE UP!!

WE DONT HAVE MUCH TIME LEFT...IDIOTS!

*whew*

now im darn tired.

im going to go sleep now.

_______________________________________________

to my 'angels': pls concentrate okie..i not it's ain't easy...but plsss try...for your sake!
to all friends: could u do mi a favour and tag or something, and pray that i will do well for 'A's'? im begging now. cant focus. feel like shit. need all the encouragement i can get. thanks la.

~~ blogging today, becoz i noe there are people there for me. thanks!

2006-09-26T12:17:00.001+08:00

SILLY 2!!

someone messaged me ytd.

tink she read my blog.

it could be Mich.

she said about 'thanking a certain silly guy'

this guy mst had like her alot.

he gave her 'chocolates', seached for 'slippers' for her, knows her favourite 'drink' and even 'wrote a song for her...'

hmm.

i wished i was 'him'.

~~

she thanked him for the 'secs', 'mins', 'hours' and 'months' he spent on her...

but gave him, none of hers.

she said that ' a silly guy [like him] could 'surely' find a girl who will do silly things for him'

but all friends could see and would agree,
that Mich is cute, attractive, innocent and silly!

she's resisting.

she's not willing to be that girl.

~~

that guy's doing his 'A's

he will probably flunk it.

how can a silly person, study well?

poor guy.

__________________________________________

to T.S.H : didnt reply u ytd. sorry! didnt know what to reply! should i say 'thank you?' or 'u're welcome?'
both are not what i want.
darn.

hee. jst realized mi grades are alrite! haha! the 'bitches' worked!

2006-09-25T16:57:00.000+08:00

SCREWED.

sometimes i wonder if 'u'( the reader!) like my style of writing.

i dun really give a damn though.

although it'd be nice to know that someone out there is share the joy/sorrow that i have in writing this shit.

'nolite te bastardes carborundorum'

its means 'dont let the bastards grind u down'

latin. a important phrase in my text.

word for word, 'bastard' would go for 'bastardes'

hmm. lets change it to bitch.

'bitches'

i jst failed two papers.

'bitches'

darn.

'bitches'

screw them all!!

'bitches'

thanks for being with my rantings.

damn..bad mood todae.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
ps. dun be a 'bastardes' and use it on yr teachers.

jamee: stilll vomitting? take care hor!

2006-09-24T21:31:00.000+08:00

I LIED.

that wasnt the last post:)

i didnt realize that i have 'fans' reading my post! thought i jst finish the 'Mich' part once and for all.

*silence*

IM going to FORGET her.

'You're beautiful. You're beautiful. You're beautiful, it's true.'

*why can i hear laughter? hmm...weird*

went for the BBQ for xiang's(sorry i still owe u a entry!) birthday thingy.

her slippers screwed, told her to go buy fast, but she took her time.

the shop closed.

she lied, and told me she bought it.

i saw through it at once.

she's still wearing someone else's shoe.

in the end, on my own, still searched for slips for her. but when i found it at 7 eleven and called her again....(xiang: thats why i missed yr b-dae!)

she lied again. (but in the end, she cycled to buy it there, anyway:)

really dont understand...why cant u jst give me a chance to be good to u?

'我爱我承认唱到我声嘶力竭那又如何你值得更好的男人'

okie. (or O-KAY!)

im going to save my tokens now.

not going to bother about u anymore.

everything i do is to make u happy, if i makes u happier to u if i dont..i wont.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

when we were coming back from east coast, she sat next to me.

she ask mi to 'siam!' but i heck...heheh.

she slept.

she looks cold.

i shifted the aircon 'tube', ( i cut myself, the damn thing's stuck!)

she doesnt know.

'我们都没错只是不适合......快乐是我的不是你给的寂寞要自己负责'

i wan to tell her, the words, that my ipod's screaming to my ear.

i wanna tell her, she's my dream girl.

'dream girl' only appears in dreams, and never a reality.

i wanna tell her, 'elves!'

but she couldn't hear! but she wouldn't hear.

....

'But it's time to face the truth,I will never be with you.'

dun link the both of us together anymore.

i closed my eyes,

and fell asleep.

i didnt dream.

i must not dream.

(i thought of the title of this entry!) -go see!

rats.

2006-09-24T21:06:00.000+08:00

FULL STOP.

wont be blogging for some time.

realli pissed with my school work and such.

haiz. it seems that im losing my enthu-ness at this crucial time but i cant help it.

everyone's saying:

'its the last stretch! sprint! sprint! sprint!'

but to me, i feel that 'it is like a swimmer that had swam for 15 laps, and is struggling, waddling, just to finish his race.

damn.

2006-09-22T11:56:00.000+08:00

MISS ROUND.

'LOL! little miss late! u noe why la!'

DX and 'round' have the same b-day and i realize that i had not blogged about this important person in this chapter of my life. try to make this as interesting as possible, becoz, nobody would be reading this blog. i didnt tell her....yet.

hmm...'round' is one of my 'better' friends in JC. Different class, different group of friends, yet someone that i realli trust, and similar to me. when im really stressed about my studies, and felt that i should have chosen poly, i would immediately feel that 'not knowing her' is the opp. cost that i would have to pay.

ouch! thats painful!

'yu ni fen xiang de xuai le..sheng kuo du zhi yong you...'

being in JC and ARTS, means that people u hang out with have unique passions and english speaking.

she's probably the few in ARTS that watches taiwanese shows, listen to 'pop' chinese songs(rainie yang rox!) and read chinese novels, almost like me:). although she takes Chinese A, she's not 'cheena'..and can hold up a interesting debate (in ENG.) with me.

mostly we talk about relationship, she provides the 'experience', while i argue back, or 'back up' using stuff that i once read.( i luv psychology, and human relationship books!)

she's special. darn special.

though she's jst a simple girl. ( even though she refuses to admit:)

when i first met her, she's quite cold and emotionless, which is wierd.

for example, she likes to reply in SMS : ' okay. alrite. bye.'

after i told her this makes her sound cold..she sort of changed, and i tink it's now making her happier, even though she probably wont admit or realize.

'你了解我所有得意的东西才常泼我冷水怕我忘形你知道我所有丢脸的事情却为我的美好形象保密..'

she's a 'head-turner.'

i once told her that i would stop saying she's cute and pretty, because 'beauty is only skin deep' and i discovered 'you are more than that.'

'attractive' is the word.

'attractive-ness' is an unexplainable aura that is exlude from her, that makes people want to be with her...

thats how i feel when im around her.

she once said: ' dont treat us to well, even if its mi ....'

how can i not?*smiles*

'我想把六色彩虹印在给你的信封一封封我都寄给叫做牵挂的邮筒当你无助的时候看着东方的天空有座桥会跟你相通....'

people like to ask if we are together....

'sometimes you have friends that u are so good and at ease with, that u dont want to get into a relationship to mar it...'

thats what she said.

how right she was.

______________________________________________________________________
To 'round': now that u hav a new boyfriend, we seems to talk less, (u msgged mi less). Is it because u have to msg 'him'? Well, i dont blame u at all. Actually, i sort of planned this too..dont want 'him' to misunderstand( like the rest of the sch! LOL!)..because we are darn close.

'幸福时候别来找我带着你的快乐和他继续往前走....你要记得至少还有我一直在为你默默守候..'

slowly you would find mi disappearing from your life. before u know it, i should be gone..

and yah. i would 'call' myself when i think of u...haha! (u know what it means)

friends forever! keyi ma?

( although u said 'forever' is very 'fake'..i still believe in it.)

thanks for being there:)

2006-09-21T15:35:00.000+08:00

STEAMBOAT!

..had steamboat with 'horse', 'chess' , 'round' , dx and his church friends. kinda fun, his friends quite nice, cook for us.. and buy extra drinks for us.. so 'thanks la'!

we first decide to walk from bus stop to esplanade but later walked back(to mrt) because none of us knew the right direction.

DX realised he lost his wallet.(ironic! b-dae boy supposed to receive presents yet he lost wallet!)

so we helped him to search for it. but after a long search..(with no success)...we went home.

what i did then, surprised even myself.

SCENE: at mrt station

DX:' hey, i lost my wallet!'

everybody looking around, searching...

Me( opens wallet and passed him some coins): 'hold on to these, use it to take train home'

at first i could not be bothered to search but in the end (i think) searched the most...

maybe its because, i am a person that does not question why and how something happens, but try to solve it, asap.

...would never question much because i feel that 'what i need to know, would be told to me, while things that i dont need to know, are better off not known.'

hence, i let go things very easily, leaving it as destiny.

"rash decisions, coincidences, and missed opportunities makes up the equation of life"

however, to some things, i still could not let go...

"loneliness, made me think of u...
yet thinking of u made me more lonely"

i remember Mich msgged me something like this, after i played her the song i made for her...

'you are not a bad guy, but too bad, im not interested in a relationship now..hee hee.. go and chase some other girl bah..dun waste time on me.'

i was happy.(yet sad -_-")

断了的弦再弹一遍我的世界你不在里面我的指尖已经弹出茧还是无法留你在我身边

cause its a great change to how she felt about me in sec 2.(lol! 4 yrs!)

..is everything so easy to forget?

..still strumming the song every night before i sleep...could u hear it?

well..haiz. at least i tried.
______________________________________________________________________

p.s. (to that guy) dun every bully my 'round' okie!! wont let u off if u do! she likes u darn lot!

2006-09-19T18:54:00.000+08:00

'SILLY ME'

saw Mich online(finally!) and wanted to pass her, her 'belated' birthday present( a big bar of chocolate, i always give her 'this' choc).. arranged to meet later, cause i need to go grab some stuff, and she's going out too.
complicated background and long story..only sec sch peeps would understand this entry bah.

waited at her block downstairs. she didnt appear.

she called and said.

'im now under my block, where are u?'

before, i could answer, my phone died.

'maybe its just what it seems, maybe we're never meant to be'

ran to the mrt station to try my luck(cause she said she's going out) and waited for a really long time...

ipod playing :desree- 'life'...

'hell no! its not fate! i could still change it!'

i pressed the 'next track' button.

ipod played: A1- 'one more try'

'..give it one more chance cause i cant give u up...i could never find another like u..'

she miraculously then appeared, smiling.

we move to take the train.

'hey, u went to my old house izzit? silly u!'

i thought: 'huh? wat old house?'

but replied anyway 'yeah, haha, silly mi!'

passed her the chocolate.. she's shocked.

'wow! such a big piece! how am i suppose to bring out? sure to melt! silly! haha! thanks!'

while keeping it in her bag.

here's the climax.

i replied seriously ' i had always been 'silly'. u noe what i mean.'

she blushed and laughed( she knows:)

my train came, and i ran for it.

ipod then started playing : fan yichen- 'i believe'

'..不知道在妄想什么　只告诉自己　i believe一定会有结果　在很久以后　留在你身边的是我　会陪着你的人是我....'

i shuffled my ipod..

'this is the song, lala lala...elmo song....'

..and closed my eyes.

2006-09-19T02:22:00.000+08:00

FIRST OFFICIAL POST!

used to feel that people who write blogs are fake.

blogs are suppose to be somewhat of a web diary, of a person's deepest thoughts.

yet by writing in blogs is like virtually showing people what u want to show them, and that's darn ridiculous..

Like a flasher flashing his balls at the poor jap girl and getting a 'hard-on'..!

everyone have dark secrets that are never revealed--> blogs are dumb and 'show offs'

for mi, its not showing off.

but just plain sharing.

growing up makes one learn new things, but by doing so one seem to lose as much.

memories tend to fade through time

at some point, we would all forget our past.

( who could remember all their primary sch friend's names? Some are worth 6 yrs of friendship!)

well. At least I make an effort.